Dick Cheney's Diary
Dear Diary
Need to get off a memo to brilliant military strategist, Richard QUAGMeyers about this. And to Al GUNzales too.
Blooding
Slicing the muslim open, either somewhere on the face or near a major vein.
"Cleansing the Soul"
To cleanse a muslim before punishment, have them drink heated or scalding materials, like scalding water, fire brands, coals, and even soaps.
The Ducking Stool
Strap Muslims into a seat which hangs from the end of a teeter-totter type contraption. Dunk into a river or pond. Not only can temperature of the water kill the victims, but leave underwater for as long as 5 minutes (or more).
The Garotte
At first, garottes were an upright post with a hole bored through them. The victim would stand or sit on a seat in front of the post, and a rope was looped around his or her neck. The rope ends were pulled through the hole in the post, and the executioner would pull on both ends of the cord, slowly strangling the victim. The CIA decided to get creative with it, and has added a spike that will be driven into the neck of the Arab as they are being strangled, parting the vertebrae. A knife can be used instead of the spike when just no other torture method would do.
The Iron Maiden of Nuremberg
The Maiden has now become a staple in every movie torture-room made. It is a coffin-shaped container that stands upright and closes firmly. On the inside of the door are long, thick spikes. Muslims or Latin American socialists are put inside, standing up, and the door is slammed on their bodies, driving the spikes through. The talons are not designed to kill outright, however, so they can enjoy their new home for several days before they died.
Knotting
This form of torture is specific to women. It involves tying a stick into a woman's hair and twisting it tighter and tighter. When the Marine's arms get tired he can hand off the task to friends while either holding the victim down or just watching. Not only will the hair be ripped out completely but the scalp will often be torn open, exposing the skull-cap. Only women with thick or long hair are chosen for this torture.
Mastectomy
In the good old days witch craft women, on the orders of GOD, had their breasts torn off with red- or white-hot clamps. The most famous case is that of Anna Pappenheimer. After already being tortured with the strappado, Anna was stripped, her flesh torn off with red-hot pincers, and her breasts cut off. The bloody breasts were then forced into her mouth and then into the mouths of her two grown sons.
The Oven
. The oven at Neisse, in Silesia, was a forerunner of the ovens used in Nazi concentration camps. The difference was that in the concentration camps, the victims were killed before they were roasted. In mid-17th-century Silesia, more than two thousand girls and women were cooked during a nine-year period. This number includes two babies. Halliburton is building a large, new one in Fallujah.
The Pear
The pear has more than one way to be used, with the most popular being orally. The pear is also used in the rectum and in the vagina, along with the chemical light. The pear is "expanded by force of the screw to the maximum aperture of their segments. The inside of the cavity in question is irremediably mutilated, nearly always fatally so. The pointed prongs at the end of the segments serve better to rip into the throat" or "the intestines." When applied vaginally, the spikes tore apart the cervix. The vaginal use is devised for women who are found guilty of sexual union with the Devil or his familiars.
Pressing
Pressing is both a death sentence and a means of drawing out confessions. Adopted as a judicial measure during the 14th century, pressing reached its peak during the reign of Henry IV.
The Rack
The Muslim is tied across a board by his ankles and wrists. Rollers at either end of the board are turned, pulling the body in opposite directions until dislocation of every joint occurred. Basically a slow, mechanical version of drawing and quartering.
The Strappado
The strappado is one of the easiest and, therefore, one of the most common torture techniques. All it takes is a rafter and a rope. The Muslim's hands are tied behind their back. One end of the rope is attached to the wrist and the other is thrown across the rafter. Then the muslim is repeatedly hauled to the roof and dropped so their arms and shoulders will dislocatete. A variant involves attaching weights to the feet of the victim as they are being dropped. This results in a harder jerk at the bottom and more bone dislocation and pain.
Strangulation
Strangulation is used either on its own or as the precursor to burning at the stake. Because being burnt alive evokes sympathy from the crowds, victims are generally dispatched of before being consigned to the flames.
Spidering
This form of torture is similar to the masectomy. The spider is a sharp iron fork that is used to mangle breasts. Again, this is a torture pretty much exclusive to women.
Thrawing
A technique wherein the Muslim's head iss tied with ropes and jerked from side to side.
Thumbscrews
Also known as pinniewinks, these tools do the same thing that boots did, except on the fingers and toes, crushing them at the root of the nail until the blood spurted out. In 1629 a woman in Prossneck, Germany, was left in the thumbscrews from 10 AM to 1 PM while the torturer and other court officials went out to lunch.
The Turcas
A turcas is used to tear out fingernails. In 1590-1591 John Fian was subjected to this and other tortures in Scotland. After his nails were ripped out, needles were driven into the quicks.
Walking
This is a "mild" form of torture used mainly in by those pussies in England. This involves making the victim walk until the are so tired they pass out and have blisters on their feet.
Water Torture
This one took inspiration to dream up. Water torture involves forcing great quantities of water, sometimes boiling, down the throat of the victim, along with a long knotted cloth. The cloth is then jerked out, which does a real number on the muslim's insides. A variation includes only feeding the victim salted foods and briny water.
The Wheel
What fun! Strap a muslim to a wheel, crush his bones with an iron bar, and hoist him up so the crowd can watch! Now, now, don't be sloppy and pierce the skin; it's so much better for him to be bleeding internally, because if no one sees any blood no one can be really sorry for him. Ooh, and for even more fun, we can put the wheel over the fire to cook the strapped in man for a bit, or we can put it on a bed of nails for our own little version of the Iron Maiden. Then, to be chairitable, we could bang his chest with the bar a few times so he can die faster!
Whipping
This is a mild, common form of torture, good in a pinch. The muslim is horse-whipped until his back is in ribbons. The whip is used on all parts of the body. When the muslim passes out they are revived and the whipping continues. This form of torture is generally a prelude to worse things.
Dick
Need to get off a memo to brilliant military strategist, Richard QUAGMeyers about this. And to Al GUNzales too.
Blooding
Slicing the muslim open, either somewhere on the face or near a major vein.
"Cleansing the Soul"
To cleanse a muslim before punishment, have them drink heated or scalding materials, like scalding water, fire brands, coals, and even soaps.
The Ducking Stool
Strap Muslims into a seat which hangs from the end of a teeter-totter type contraption. Dunk into a river or pond. Not only can temperature of the water kill the victims, but leave underwater for as long as 5 minutes (or more).
The Garotte
At first, garottes were an upright post with a hole bored through them. The victim would stand or sit on a seat in front of the post, and a rope was looped around his or her neck. The rope ends were pulled through the hole in the post, and the executioner would pull on both ends of the cord, slowly strangling the victim. The CIA decided to get creative with it, and has added a spike that will be driven into the neck of the Arab as they are being strangled, parting the vertebrae. A knife can be used instead of the spike when just no other torture method would do.
The Iron Maiden of Nuremberg
The Maiden has now become a staple in every movie torture-room made. It is a coffin-shaped container that stands upright and closes firmly. On the inside of the door are long, thick spikes. Muslims or Latin American socialists are put inside, standing up, and the door is slammed on their bodies, driving the spikes through. The talons are not designed to kill outright, however, so they can enjoy their new home for several days before they died.
Knotting
This form of torture is specific to women. It involves tying a stick into a woman's hair and twisting it tighter and tighter. When the Marine's arms get tired he can hand off the task to friends while either holding the victim down or just watching. Not only will the hair be ripped out completely but the scalp will often be torn open, exposing the skull-cap. Only women with thick or long hair are chosen for this torture.
Mastectomy
In the good old days witch craft women, on the orders of GOD, had their breasts torn off with red- or white-hot clamps. The most famous case is that of Anna Pappenheimer. After already being tortured with the strappado, Anna was stripped, her flesh torn off with red-hot pincers, and her breasts cut off. The bloody breasts were then forced into her mouth and then into the mouths of her two grown sons.
The Oven
. The oven at Neisse, in Silesia, was a forerunner of the ovens used in Nazi concentration camps. The difference was that in the concentration camps, the victims were killed before they were roasted. In mid-17th-century Silesia, more than two thousand girls and women were cooked during a nine-year period. This number includes two babies. Halliburton is building a large, new one in Fallujah.
The Pear
The pear has more than one way to be used, with the most popular being orally. The pear is also used in the rectum and in the vagina, along with the chemical light. The pear is "expanded by force of the screw to the maximum aperture of their segments. The inside of the cavity in question is irremediably mutilated, nearly always fatally so. The pointed prongs at the end of the segments serve better to rip into the throat" or "the intestines." When applied vaginally, the spikes tore apart the cervix. The vaginal use is devised for women who are found guilty of sexual union with the Devil or his familiars.
Pressing
Pressing is both a death sentence and a means of drawing out confessions. Adopted as a judicial measure during the 14th century, pressing reached its peak during the reign of Henry IV.
The Rack
The Muslim is tied across a board by his ankles and wrists. Rollers at either end of the board are turned, pulling the body in opposite directions until dislocation of every joint occurred. Basically a slow, mechanical version of drawing and quartering.
The Strappado
The strappado is one of the easiest and, therefore, one of the most common torture techniques. All it takes is a rafter and a rope. The Muslim's hands are tied behind their back. One end of the rope is attached to the wrist and the other is thrown across the rafter. Then the muslim is repeatedly hauled to the roof and dropped so their arms and shoulders will dislocatete. A variant involves attaching weights to the feet of the victim as they are being dropped. This results in a harder jerk at the bottom and more bone dislocation and pain.
Strangulation
Strangulation is used either on its own or as the precursor to burning at the stake. Because being burnt alive evokes sympathy from the crowds, victims are generally dispatched of before being consigned to the flames.
Spidering
This form of torture is similar to the masectomy. The spider is a sharp iron fork that is used to mangle breasts. Again, this is a torture pretty much exclusive to women.
Thrawing
A technique wherein the Muslim's head iss tied with ropes and jerked from side to side.
Thumbscrews
Also known as pinniewinks, these tools do the same thing that boots did, except on the fingers and toes, crushing them at the root of the nail until the blood spurted out. In 1629 a woman in Prossneck, Germany, was left in the thumbscrews from 10 AM to 1 PM while the torturer and other court officials went out to lunch.
The Turcas
A turcas is used to tear out fingernails. In 1590-1591 John Fian was subjected to this and other tortures in Scotland. After his nails were ripped out, needles were driven into the quicks.
Walking
This is a "mild" form of torture used mainly in by those pussies in England. This involves making the victim walk until the are so tired they pass out and have blisters on their feet.
Water Torture
This one took inspiration to dream up. Water torture involves forcing great quantities of water, sometimes boiling, down the throat of the victim, along with a long knotted cloth. The cloth is then jerked out, which does a real number on the muslim's insides. A variation includes only feeding the victim salted foods and briny water.
The Wheel
What fun! Strap a muslim to a wheel, crush his bones with an iron bar, and hoist him up so the crowd can watch! Now, now, don't be sloppy and pierce the skin; it's so much better for him to be bleeding internally, because if no one sees any blood no one can be really sorry for him. Ooh, and for even more fun, we can put the wheel over the fire to cook the strapped in man for a bit, or we can put it on a bed of nails for our own little version of the Iron Maiden. Then, to be chairitable, we could bang his chest with the bar a few times so he can die faster!
Whipping
This is a mild, common form of torture, good in a pinch. The muslim is horse-whipped until his back is in ribbons. The whip is used on all parts of the body. When the muslim passes out they are revived and the whipping continues. This form of torture is generally a prelude to worse things.
Dick
posted by TheFuriousGourmet | 12:04 PM
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